tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34350980111569915652024-02-20T14:42:16.188-05:00His Mercies are New Every MorningEncouragement and Support for MomsChristyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-61379473675099675662011-05-05T19:24:00.006-04:002011-05-06T21:05:52.789-04:00Happy Mother's DayAs I prepare to speak at a Mother's Day Luncheon on Saturday a lot of thoughts go through my mind. I have been looking at how I have been doing as a mom this year. I think about the ideal mother and what she should look like. And as I have been thinking about these things I have come to realize there is a huge discrepancy between the two.<br /><br />I think most of us have this high ideal of what the perfect mom is like. I asked some friends on Facebook to describe the perfect mom in one word. Here are some words they came up with: patient, security, comfort, godly, compassionate, servant, wise, understanding, forever, involved and gentle. I am sure you can come up with some words of your own.<br /><br />The perfect mother always has a clean home, well behaved children, and she never raises her voice. She always cooks delicious meals from scratch and then makes sure the kitchen is spotless when she is done. She bakes cookies after school, but makes sure there are two vegetables on everyone's plate at dinner (and her kids don't complain about eating them). She is never too tired to play with her kids or spend time with her husband. She volunteers at the church, the school and for field trips. Or better yet, she homeschools. She always reads her bible before starting her day and prays for everyone before bed. She is never selfish with her time and always gives the best of herself to others. I could go on and on. You get the picture.<br /><br />When I start to think of this ideal mother on mother's day I get this nagging feeling of guilt. You probably know what I am talking about. This feeling deep inside that, as a mother, I have fallen very short! <br /><br />Every mother carries a measure of hidden guilt. We see our selfishness, impatience, and anger and we feel guilty. We look around at the piles of laundry and dirty dishes and undone housework and feel guilty. We finally get around to doing the laundry, dishes and housework and we feel guilty we don't spend more time with our kids. We try to stick to a budget, but don't feel like cooking so McDonald's here we come! Then we feel guilty for the fast food we ate and the money we really couldn't afford to spend. By the end of the day we are exhausted and have no patience for drawn out bed times, last minute drinks or midnight wake up calls. Again the list could go on and on.<br /><br />If we are honest with ourselves, at the end of most days if we measured ourselves on the scale of perfection, we fall far short of an ideal mother. Not a single one of us is alone in that struggle. We all fall short. Sometimes very short.<br /><br />So how can we become an "ideal mother"? Is it possible? We strive to live better, do better, be better and realize that is not the answer. Beating ourselves up over our faults and failures is not the answer either. Harboring hidden guilt or shame is not the answer. So what is the answer? Quite simply Jesus!<br /><br />When we talk about the perfect mom we think of someone filled with<span style="font-weight: bold;"> love</span>, who considers raising her children a <span style="font-weight: bold;">joy</span>, someone whose home is full of <span style="font-weight: bold;">peace</span> and has never ending <span style="font-weight: bold;">patience</span>. She is <span style="font-weight: bold;">kind</span> and does <span style="font-weight: bold;">good</span> for others, She is <span style="font-weight: bold;">faithful</span> to her family and friends, she is always <span style="font-weight: bold;">gentle</span> and <span style="font-weight: bold;">self controlled</span>....Wait a minute. That looks an awful lot like Galatians 5:22! "The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control"<br /><br />We may not possess the ability to be a perfect mom in our own strength, but the Holy Spirit is perfect and the fruit of the Holy Spirit in our lives is all of those things. We must allow the guilt we feel and the failings we see in our lives to draw us to the feet of Jesus. To a place of surrender. <br /><br />Often we struggle and strive in our own strength to change who we are. I don't know about you, but I could strive all day long to be patient and all I will end up doing is hyperventilating from taking deep breaths and counting to ten over and over. I need something more than my own strength and will power to change. I need something greater than my weakness, stronger than my best effort, and more merciful than my conscience. I need Jesus and the power of his Holy Spirit.<br /><br /><span style="font-size:100%;">Ephesians 3:16-20 says "That He (God) would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with <span style="font-weight: bold;">might by His Spirit</span> in the inner man; That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height; And to know the love of Christ, which passes knowledge, that you might be <span style="font-weight: bold;">filled with all the fulness of God</span>. Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the <span style="font-weight: bold;">power that works in us.</span>"<br /><br />It is HIS power that works in us and strengthens us. His Spirit that fills us with the very fullness of God. His power that does exceedingly, abundantly, above all we ask or even think. He CAN change our hearts and lives!<br /><br />Look at the number of times this passage refers to our understanding of God's love for us. Often when we feel guilt or see our failures and faults we begin to believe that God is disappointed in us and doesn't love us. We allow this condemnation to push us away from God. When in reality God adores us, dances over us with joy, and counts us as righteous through Christ. He loves us so much he sent His own Spirit to dwell in our hearts and give us what we need to be set free and changed into the women of God he has called us to be.<br /><br />When you begin to feel guilty for how far you fall short of perfection as a mother, just remember that it is the power of God, the strength of the Spirit and the love of Christ that is going to change you. You need Him and to surrender your weaknesses to Him. Sit at His feet, soak up His love, let him change you from glory to glory. He is able to do exceedingly, abundantly, above all we ask or imagine!<br /><br />Happy Mother's Day!<br /></span>Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-74209495492850112722010-12-05T16:08:00.004-05:002010-12-05T17:05:33.100-05:00Messy Christmas<span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">I have been quite slack in keeping up with my blog this year! Woops! I wanted to post something for Christmas and hope that it encourages you. These thoughts are from a devotional I am sharing with our Woman's ministry at church.</span><br /><br />What comes to mind when you think of Christmas? First thoughts... what comes to mind? Gifts, lights, music, family gatherings, yummy food? We have this quaint idea of what Christmas looks like. It is all "holly and mistletoe". But the reality can be quite different. If we give ourselves time to think about what Christmas "is" rather than what it is "supposed to be" we might think of words more like debt, stress, loneliness, loss, regret, fights, complicated families, etc. Let's be honest, sometimes Christmas is a messy affair!<br /><br />When you think of the very first Christmas what words come to mind? Angels, wise men, shepherds, baby Jesus, Mary, Joseph? We automatically think of a sweet little manger scene.<br /><br />Recently I had the chance to take my girls on a field trip to an Abby that had 73 different Creche displays from all over the world. Each manger scene was beautifully crafted and pictured relatively the same thing. A quiet little scene where everyone was adoring baby Jesus. But when we take the time to dig a little deeper into the story of Jesus' birth we will find that the first Christmas was a messy affair as well.<br /><br />Think of these things as they relate to the birth of Jesus. A scandalous pregnant teen mother. A long, painful journey at nine months of pregnancy. A difficult, first time birth on a filthy cave floor surrounded by the stench of dung and sweaty animals. Imagine using bug infested straw as the only ground cover for your birth. Think of placing your newborn baby in a rickety old feeding trough because there was nowhere else to lay him where he wouldn't get trampled underfoot by the animals. And the first visitors to see this newborn king? The very dregs of society. Men who slept with sheep and seldom bathed, were the first to hold this precious child. Then a crazed king plots to hunt down and kill Jesus causing the slaughter of hundreds of innocent baby boys who were ripped right out of their mother's arms. A whole city grieved and weept for the loss. Truly the first Christmas was a messy affair.<br /><br />But here is my point. We think that everyone has it together. We go to church and only see those around us when they are at their best. Best dressed, best smiles, best worship... We think we should have our act together like "so and so" who sits up front with her flawless makeup and heart of praise. But the reality , if we look deeper, is we have our messes!<br /><br />Psalm 40:2 says "He brought me up also out of a horrible pit, out of a miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock and established my goings"<br /><br />We were all rescued from a pit. A pit of sin, pain, brokenness, heartache or loss. Every single one of us. That is the whole point! Jesus left the glory of heaven to rescue us from our horrible pit, and miry clay that was sucking us down. Almighty God with all His glory and power, all His wisdom and strength, His peace and hope. In His righteousness and justice compelled by His love, looked down and saw us. He saw the loneliness, abuse, loss, divorce, heartbreak, fear, doubt, depression and grief... He saw it all and He came as a baby in a manger.<br /><br />Philipians 2:7 says Jesus made himself of no reputation, and took on himself the form of a servant and was made in the likeness of men<br /><br />He came born of a virgin who's life was filled with scandal, in a stable filled with filth. He was greeted by the dregs of society and hunted by a crazed king. His birth was surrounded by death and loss. All so that he could pull us out of our messy pit and set our feet on a solid rock.<br /><br />Isaiah 61:1-3 referring to Jesus says "The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me; because the Lord has anointed me to preach good tidings to the meek, the poor and afflicted; he has sent me to bind up and heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those that are bound;... to comfort all that mourn;... to give to them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise instead of a heavy, burdened, and failing spirit..."<br /><br />The reason I celebrate Christmas with such joy isn't because it comes neatly wrapped in perfect holiday cheer. But rather, because God in all His mercy and grace looked down on this mess I call life and, in His great love, sent His son as a baby in a manger to bring me everlasting hope. He took my broken heart and made it whole. He took a hurting, abused girl from a broken home and gave her peace and hope and a reason to rejoice.<br /><br />Life is messy. If your life is a mess right now remember, that first Christmas was a messy affair as well. Jesus came to give you forgiveness, hope and peace. He came and reached down into your horrible pit so he could set your feet on a rock to stay.<br /><br />So maybe this year we shouldn't wish each other a "merry" Christmas, but rather a "messy" Christmas as a reminder of the hope Jesus brings to our mess filled lives. Truly we have every reason to rejoice this Christmas. "For God so greatly loved the world that he gave up his only son that whoever believes in him will not perish, but have everlasting life"<br /><br />I wish you a Messy Christmas!Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-16426884503586379172010-05-08T22:18:00.003-04:002010-05-08T23:03:19.536-04:00Happy Mother's Day<span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family: georgia;">Tomorrow is mother's day. As a mom of three small girls, I wonder what word of wisdom, or encouragement I might have to offer other moms. So often I find myself struggling through my days. Frustrated with the daily things that frustrate moms. Messy rooms, meals to cook, muddy feet, running late, attitudes that need adjusting, whining voices... need I go on. So if I find myself struggling as a mother, how can I give any advice? What possible word of encouragement can I pass on to you? I suppose if I looked to myself I wouldn't find much to offer other moms. I think most days I am the one in need of a word of wisdom and encouragement. Thankfully I do know where I can find something to encourage all you moms out there.<br /><br />I don't believe I have ever met a mom who was confident in her skills at parenting. Most moms I talk to feel inadequate. I think it is safe to say most moms feel like they fail in some way nearly every day. We all want to be that soft spoken women with unending patience. We wish we were a cross between Mary Poppins and June Cleaver. But we aren't. We are women who get frustrated, impatient, even angry. We are mothers who love our children with all our hearts, but sometimes don't quite know how to show that love. We get emotionally drained and fed up with laundry and dishes. We wonder when in the world the underwear will pick itself up, cause it sure seems like no one is going to get around to doing it. I doubt that I am the only mother at night who sighs a huge sigh of relief when we realize that the last glass of water has been given and the kids are<span style="font-style: italic;"> finally</span> asleep.<br /><br />There is something about having children that shows us who we really are. They are like little mirrors that reflect our hearts. On a good day we see love shining on their faces and believe that we are raising incredible children. But what about those not so wonderful moments? You know the ones I am talking about. The ones where the reflection we see in our little mirrors shows that our heart is anything but perfect. You know, that moment when you can hear your bossy 6 year old telling her little brother exactly what he can do and how and she is using that "tone" that just makes you cringe. But as you get ready to put her in her place you realize that just yesterday you said those very words and used that very tone to speak to your kids. And you cringe. Or maybe the image in the mirror is an angry voice saying things you swore you would never say to your kids. Or perhaps you see your own selfishness when you realize that you really would rather meet your need before you meet the needs of your kids. After all reading that book is a lot more relaxing than helping your kids figure out how to play a new game. Sometimes it can be hard to look at the image in the mirror.<br /><br />So where is my word of encouragement? It is this. None of us is perfect. We all fail. We all mess up as mom's and we all wish we could do better and be better. But there is someone who sees us in all our mess. He sees all our weaknesses and he loves us still. I am not talking about your husband! I am talking about Jesus. <br /><br />As I was thinking about how unlovely I feel at times as a mom I remembered just how deep God's love is for me. Just how unfailing and unconditional it is. And I was reminded of the book of Song of Solomon. It is a book that describes a plain young woman who was forced to work in her families vineyard. She felt ugly and unworthy. And yet the King fell in love with her and pursued her. It is a beautiful picture of the power of unconditional love. <br /><br />My favorite passage in the book is chapter 2:10-14<br />My Beloved spoke, and said to me, Rise up, My love, My beautiful one, and come away.<br />For lo, the winter is past, the rain is over; it goes to itself.<br />The flowers appear on the earth; the time of singing has come, and the voice of the turtle-dove is heard in our land;<br />The fig tree puts forth her green figs, and the vines with the tender grape give a good smell. Arise, My love, My beautiful one, and come away.<br />O My dove, in the clefts of the rock, in the secret places of the stairs, let Me see your face, let Me hear your voice; for your voice is sweet, and your face is beautiful.<br /><br />The King is calling her to a place of being close to him. He wants to spend time with her and drawn near to her. And I love the image that is painted in that last verse. A dove will find a crack in a rock to hide in. It will seek out protection and safety there. When a storm rages, or there is a threat, the dove will flee to the cleft and find refuge there.<br /><br />What a beautiful image that paints in my mind. Sometimes I feel like that trembling little dove who needs a safe place to seek refuge. A place where I can draw near to God and find that he longs to fill me with his love.<br /><br />The Song of Solomon continues as the journey of the couple develops. The young girl faces difficult circumstances, she is beaten for seeking the one she loves, she seeks through the night and can't find him. She feels lost and alone and yet doesn't give up. In the end she finds her love and she clings to him and doesn't let him go. She has come to depend on his love and rely on the truth of how he sees her. No longer is she unworthy or unlovely. She is a princess among queens. She has also come to value who the King is. She understands his strength and the depth of his love. <br /><br />The final chapter of the Song of Solomon says "Who is this coming up from the wilderness, leaning on her Beloved?" What a beautiful picture that is. Of a woman so in love with the King, who has been so consumed with his love, that she can come out the other side of a "wilderness" leaning on him. Close to his side.<br /><br />When I remember these verses and I think of this story I am so encouraged. I know that I have a long way to go as a mother. But I also know where I can go to find protection from the storm. I know where I can go when I need to be reminded of my value. I know that I have a King who is so consumed with love for me that He was willing to die for me. He died so that I don't have to remain the way I am. So that the image in the mirror can change day to day. So that I can become the mom I hope someday to be.<br /><br />As a mother you may feel overwhelmed and frustrated. Remember there is a rock you can flee to. A King who wants you to draw near to him so he can lavish His love on you. You are not alone in your battles. There is one who will stand with you. Run to Him!<br /><br />Happy Mother's Day!<br /><br /></span></span>Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-23225339886587117722009-12-05T20:12:00.003-05:002009-12-06T22:32:02.906-05:00What will you do?<div style="text-align: center; color: rgb(0, 51, 0);font-family:verdana;"><span style="font-size:180%;">Merry Christmas!<br /></span></div><br />This Christmas I have been asking myself a question. What will I do with Jesus? I don't know what your life has been like lately, but mine has been filled with all kinds of hustle and bustle. This year more than any year before I find that I am distracted by all that is going on from what is really important. So I have been trying to take some time to think about what I will do with the Christmas story this year. How will I let it touch my heart and life?<br /><br />As I have been reading through the first few chapters of Matthew and Luke I have been struck by the fact that the whole Christmas story is filled with how people reacted to the birth of Jesus. Some were filled with fear, some were angry, some were simply too busy to notice him. I am wondering what I can learn from their stories and how that will affect me this year. I wanted to share with you some of the things God has been showing me. Maybe it will help us all to stop for a minute and decide what we are going to do with Jesus this Christmas.<br /><br />When you read the Christmas story the first character who is affected by the coming of Jesus is Mary. When the angel came to her and blessed her she was confused, even fearful. What could God possibly want with her? As soon as she was reassured that God was the God of the impossible, her heart was immediately put at ease and she completely trusted God with utter abandon. She had a child like faith that was filled with trust.<br /><br />I have always marveled at Mary's faith. It is so pure and simple. Tonight as I read how she visited Elisabeth, her cousin, and was encouraged in her faith, I realized again just how vital it is to have women of faith in our lives. Women we can trust in our time of need to show us how to draw closer to God. But what really struck me was the pronouncement of faith Mary gives to Elisabeth. You can read it in Luke 1:46-55. Mary had an amazing understanding of who God was. Her faith came from an unwavering knowledge of who her God was and what he had promised to do.<br /><br />Mary knew that a mighty God who could do great things, would be able to do the impossible for her. She understood that a God who showed mercy to those who feared him, would stand by her if she trusted him. She knew that the God of strength who could scatter the proud, would protect her in all circumstances. That a God who could cast down the mighty and exalt the humble, could hold her when she was weak. She had no doubt that a God who feeds the hungry would provide for her. That the God who helped Israel would rescue her. Her faith was grounded in the truth of who God was.<br /><br />It made me wonder... when I face the impossible what do I stand on? Do I have faith that is grounded in who God is? Does that faith help me to trust God with total abandon? Do I believe that God can indeed do the impossible in my life?<br /><br />Of course when we think of Mary we also think of Joseph. One particular phrase in Matthew stood out to me as I read how Joseph reacted to the birth of Jesus. Matt 1:20 says "while he thought on these things". Joseph was just told that the woman who was promised to marry him was with child. No only was Mary with child, but she claimed it was a miracle of God, the coming messiah. I wonder if that claim angered him? Maybe frustrated him? How hurt he must have been! How very embarrassed. But being a man of honer he didn't want to create a huge scandal. He must have been consumed with a million thoughts at once. I doubt he slept very well. You know how it is. You get stressed out, thoughts consume you, worry is pressing down on you. It is a horrible feeling. And yet "while he thought on these things" God spoke to him. God came to him in the middle of the night when his worries, fears, doubts and frustrations must have consumed him. And God simply told him to trust in His plan for this baby. That if he would marry Mary and raise Jesus as his own son, Jesus would save his people from their sins.<br /><br />I don't imagine that Joseph took that dream lightly. It was a serious thing to be the father of the messiah. I wonder if he felt like running? God's plan can be hard to swallow sometimes. Joseph could have said "no thanks, this is not for me!" He could have put Mary away quietly and never had to deal with her and her scandalous baby again. But instead he chose to trust God's plan for his life. And because of that trust he would become a vital role in God's greatest gift to man... salvation.<br /><br />We are all given choices in life. God places before us His will and then we are asked what we will do with it. Do we let fear, doubt, and confusion decide for us? Or do we let God lead us in the plan he has for our lives?<br /><br />So Joseph embraces God's will for his life and accepts Mary as his wife. They then pack up and head to Bethlehem to be taxed. Bethlehem is teeming with people. Everyone is having to go to the town of their lineage to be taxed. The streets are full of noisy people, frustrated travelers, overworked shop keepers, maybe even a few moms yelling at their rowdy children... it is a mad house so to speak. It kind of makes me think of my local mall at Christmas time! And in the midst of all this hustle and bustle there is a young woman in labor riding on a donkey. I wonder if a few women might have looked at her with sympathy while silently thanking God they weren't in her shoes! In all that business no one stopped to help them. No one offered them a helping hand.<br /><br />And what of the Inn Keeper? His Inn was full to overflowing. All the extra travelers coming to town probably had him overworked and tired. There was a constant flow of customers as one bed would empty and another guest would rush to take his place. I wonder if he was too weary to really take notice of Mary and Joseph. He simply brushed them off and relegated Jesus to the back corner of the stable.<br /><br />When life is busy and we have a million things clamoring for our attention, do we stop to notice Jesus? When we are overwhelmed and stressed where do we place Jesus in our lives? Do we put him on the back burner so to speak? Do we push thoughts of God aside and forget that Jesus is there?<br /><br />In the midst of all the craziness going on in Bethlehem, the hills were a quiet refuge. If you could go back to that night you would have found a quiet flock of sheep grazing in the hills. And a small group of faithful shepherds keeping watch over their flock. The shepherds were considered the low of the low in society. They were the outcasts. Everyone depended on shepherds to provide the sheep that were vital to their society, but no one wanted to be a shepherd. When the Christmas story says "lowly shepherds" that is just what it means!<br /><br />There is something so very sad about a stereotype. No matter how much a person tries it is almost impossible to change how a stereotype affects the way people think. Shepherds were hard working men. They would lay down their lives to protect their flock. They ate with them, slept with them and kept careful watch over them. It is no wonder Jesus used the idea of a shepherd to describe his care for us. Sadly, for all their work, people still looked down on them.<br /><br />And yet, when the shepherds were given the "good news of great joy" by the angels, they eagerly ran to find Jesus. What is even more amazing is that these humble men did not keep this good news to themselves. When they found Jesus there was no hesitation to share the truth of their discovery. They ran to tell all those people who had looked down on them of the great joy they had found in Jesus. And the people marveled that lowly shepherds had seen the messiah, the long awaited king. They couldn't believe that angels visited the humble outcasts. What an amazing testimony!<br /><br />I wonder what we would have done in their place? When we are hurt by people or judge wrongly by others, do we think to tell them of the joy we have in Jesus? Does the joy of the Lord so consume us that we can't help to share his love? Even with those who have wronged us?<br /><br />It didn't take long for the news of Jesus' birth to spread. After all you have "lowly" shepherds shouting out the news to anyone who would listen. But for the magi from the East, it wasn't the story the shepherds told that lead them to Jesus, it was a bright star.<br /><br />The magi (or wise men) were great astronomers of their time. And when Jesus was born a new star appeared in the heavens. These wise men must have known the prophecies and traditions that had been told for years of a coming King. They saw this new star as a sign that he had been born. And so began a long journey to seek the King of kings.<br /><br />Most historians and commentaries will agree that the wise men studied and followed that star for about two years. They arrived in Israel when Jesus was a small boy. Not knowing where to find this new King they looked in the obvious place, Herod's palace. According to the scholars in the palace, the messiah was to be born in Bethlehem. The wise men immediately sought him there. They were overjoyed when they realized the star they had followed did indeed rest over Bethlehem. Suddenly the long journey that lasted years seemed insignificant. They had found their King. He wasn't dressed in robes or sitting on a throne, but they knew him when they found him. And when they came before Jesus they worshiped and gave him their greatest treasures.<br /><br />I wonder, when our journey gets long and hard, where is our faith? Do we rely on our emotions to lead us and let them lead us astray? Or do we trust in the truth, in God's word and promises, to lead us? It can be a long journey before we find Jesus at the end of the road. Are we willing to trust he is leading us? Do we choose to worship God and give him our greatest treasures?<br /><br />King Herod was also given a chance to worship Jesus. The magi had come to him first and had shared their journey with him. But Herod was a man consumed with himself, a man who wanted his own will rather than God's. He was a man who would use others and he wouldn't hesitate to manipulate people in order to get his way.<br /><br />When the wise men came to Herod I am sure he appeared quite sincere to them. He immediately sought out scholars to search the scriptures to find out where this messiah was to be born. When he gave the information to the magi he told them that he wanted to worship Jesus too. Outwardly he appeared to be just as sincere as the wise men were. Yet his heart was far from his words and apparent actions. He was too preoccupied with his own will to consider God's will. His ambition blinded him to truth.<br /><br />In the end Herod's choices, his pride, ambition, jealousy and anger all led to death. When he didn't get his way he lashed out at the innocent in anger. A slaughter of small boys in Bethlehem paid the price for his ambition and pride.<br /><br />Sometimes even we can have selfish pride or ambition that blinds us. When our will is confronted with Jesus, do we let pride harden our hearts? Do we lash out in anger or manipulate those around us to get our way? In the end those actions will only lead to death. God always gives us a choice. May we choose life!<br /><br />After looking at all these people who were confronted with the birth of Jesus I have to ask myself- where did they get their faith? How do I find the faith to trust God completely like Mary did? Or to let go of fear and follow God's will like Joseph did. How do I set aside the business of life and embrace Jesus? Is it possible for me to let go of the hurt and rejection from others and let God fill me with joy so that I can share God's love just as those shepherds did so many years ago. Will I find myself, like the magi, at the end of a long and dusty road worshiping Jesus and trusting him with the deepest treasures of my heart? Can I let go of my ambition and the plans I have made for my life and let God be King of my life?<br /><br />Each of these people had one thing in common. They had the scriptures to lead them. They had some amazing prophecies to stand on. They had truth to guide them. We have to have an "eternal perspective" to find faith in the midst of hardships. We have to have an understanding of who God is. Each of these people had that kind of faith. I want to share a few verses with you in hopes that it will encourage you to stand in faith. Whatever you face, where ever you are at this Christmas, may these verses inspire you to faith! They are the same verses that these men and women of old stood on. <span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);"><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">The prophet Isaiah foretold of Jesus, he gives us a clear picture of who God is.<br /></span>For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called <span style="font-weight: bold;"><br />Wonderful</span>,<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Counselor</span>,<br />The <span style="font-weight: bold;">mighty God</span>,<br />The <span style="font-weight: bold;">everlasting Father</span>,<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">The Prince of Peace</span>.</span> <span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);">Isa 9:6<br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">God wants to be those things to us! In the midst of the business, the hurt, the confusion, at the end of the long journey... God wants to be all of those things for us.</span><br /></span><br />Isaiah also foretold of the plan God had for Jesus as our savior.<br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);"> He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not. </span><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);"><br />Surely <span style="font-weight: bold;">he has borne our griefs</span>,<br />and <span style="font-weight: bold;">carried our sorrows</span>:<br />yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted. </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);">But he was <span style="font-weight: bold;">wounded for our transgressions</span>,<br />he was <span style="font-weight: bold;">bruised for our iniquities</span>:<br />the <span style="font-weight: bold;">chastisement of our peace was upon him</span>;<br />and <span style="font-weight: bold;">with his stripes we are healed</span>. </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);">All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the LORD hath laid on him the iniquity of us all. </span><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);"> </span><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);">Isaiah 53:3-6<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">In the end Jesus' death brought us life because...</span><br /></span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);">The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me; because<br />the LORD hath anointed me to preach<span style="font-weight: bold;"> good tidings unto the meek</span>;<br />he hath sent me to<span style="font-weight: bold;"> bind up the brokenhearted</span>,<br />to <span style="font-weight: bold;">proclaim liberty to the captives</span>,<br />and the <span style="font-weight: bold;">opening of the prison to them that are bound</span>; </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);">To proclaim the acceptable year of the LORD,<br /> and the day of vengeance of our God;<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">to comfort all that mourn</span>; </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);">To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion,<br />to give unto them <span style="font-weight: bold;">beauty for ashes</span>,<br />the <span style="font-weight: bold;">oil of joy for mourning</span>,<br />the <span style="font-weight: bold;">garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness</span>;<br />that they might be called trees of righteousness,<br />the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified. </span><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);">Isa 61:1-3</span><br /><br />Truly God has set us free from all that has had us bound. He can heal the brokenhearted, free those bound in sin, lift up those who are weary, and comfort the greatest loss. He can do all things in our lives if we will allow him. He truly is the King of kings and came as a baby in a manger to show us his love.<br /><br />and so we should praise him for all he has done! This verse has always been one of my favorite Christmas verses.<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);">Lift up your heads, O ye gates; and be ye lift up, ye everlasting doors;<br />and the <span style="font-weight: bold;">King of glory</span> shall come in. </span><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);"><br />Who is this King of glory?<br />The <span style="font-weight: bold;">Lord strong and mighty</span>,<br />the <span style="font-weight: bold;">Lord mighty in battle</span>. </span><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);"><br />Lift up your heads, O ye gates; even lift them up, ye everlasting doors;<br />and the King of glory shall come in. </span><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);"><br />Who is this King of glory? <span style="font-weight: bold;"><br />The Lord of hosts, he is the King of glory</span>. </span><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);">Psa 24:7-10</span><br /><br />The God who spoke to them so long ago is still speaking today. He is speaking to each and every one of us. He wants to do the impossible in our lives. Truly God is a great God. He was born in a little town called Bethlehem, amidst all the noise and clamor. So great was his love for us that he took our sins upon himself. Not only did he free us from the bondage of sin, but he can heal our broken hearts and lives. He longs for us to trust him and believe that He can lead us in this life. <br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 0);font-size:130%;" >What will you do with Jesus this Christmas?</span>Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-3809658170508822312009-08-21T14:35:00.002-04:002009-08-21T15:08:36.022-04:00Overwhelmed by LoveWhat a busy crazy summer it has been. I haven't had much time to think about updating my blog! But yesterday I had a conversation with my girls that sparked a thought. Today I want to share that thought.<br /><br />While I was making lunch for my girls yesterday, they got on the conversation of heaven. I can't even remember how it started. Sierra asked me if we will be able to actually see God. She seemed in awe of the idea of actually seeing what God looked like. I tried to think of how to describe the feeling they will have when they actually get to see Jesus face to face.<br /><br />I told them it will be the most marvelous feeling. That we will feel so completely loved. I described it as that feeling they get when their father or I hold them. When we have one of those special moments just between the two of us and we tell them how much we love them. There is a wonderful feeling that rises up in your heart when you have a moment like that. A secure feeling of complete and total love. It can be overwhelming at times. I told them that that is what talking to Jesus will be like all the time. We will simply be overwhelmed by the absolute love of God for us. What a glorious thought!<br /><br />When I think of heaven I don't think of streets of gold or mansions that are made for each of us. I don't even think of all the people we will see or meet or the incredible things there will be to do and see. I think about just how incredible it will be to actually know God for who he is, and be surrounded by his presence w/o having to struggle past all the things that hinder us. To be overwhelmed by his love constantly.<br /><br />In the here and now it can be so hard to feel God, to know him, to give him our heart. There are so many things that hold us back. This side of heaven we build walls around our hearts. We have guilt and shame to hold us down. We made bad decisions or are hurt by others. There are so many things that can cause us to keep God at arms length. <br /><br />Being a Christian isn't about the rules or the church or a religion. So many people who call themselves Christians live as though that is what God desires. Just follow the rules, go to church and try to live right. But that is not what God longs for. He simply wants us to come. To surrender. To stand before him just as we are, with all our baggage and pain and heart ache. To bring him those burdens we carry and lay them at his feet so that he can carry them for us. He simply wants us to trust him and surrender our hearts to him. It is when we allow the walls to come down before God, when we give him all the junk we hold onto and all the dreams we long for, that he begins to change us from the inside out. <br /><br />Sometimes the surrendering can be a whole lot harder than following a list of rules and "living right". When we are living a legalistic life it almost makes us feel better about how good we are being or that we might be able to earn God's love. But in the end it will leave us empty and frustrated. <br /><br />So why then do we find it so hard to give God our hearts? The deep places that no one else even knows about? Because it is a scary thing to open your heart and be vulnerable. This world of hurt has taught us to build up walls, not tear them down. People have hurt us and rejected us and taught us not to trust. How then do we begin to trust a God we can't see? It takes a step of faith. <br /><br />For nearly 20 years I have been giving God my heart. Letting him heal my wounds, lead my life, and fill me with His love. And I still find it hard to surrender. A walk with God is a progression of surrender. Over time he has asked me to let go of things one at a time. I can still remember the moment I let go of the bitterness in my heart toward someone who has abused me. Oh how hard that moment was until it was done. Then- oh the freedom! But it wasn't until 3 years later that I was ready to actually forgive that person. God knew that I couldn't deal with the bitterness and unforgiveness at the same time. For that area of my heart he simply asked me to give them as I could. And in return I found freedom and love and peace like I had never known before.<br /><br />I don't know what struggles you are facing today. If you are human, alive and breathing... then I suspect you have a struggle in your life. Life is full of all kinds of heart ache. Some of our own making, most from others or the struggles of living. I may not know what you are facing today. But I do know that God is there waiting to love you and fill your heart with peace. He isn't asking for you to give anything other than who you are. Just to stand before him and let it all go. Every battle, every struggle, ever sin, ever dream... whatever it might be. He wants to carry the load for you. He wants to be the one you turn to when you need to give your pain to someone. He wants to be the one you trust and lay your heart before. So, take a chance, and open your heart to Jesus today. I know I need to give him more of myself today too. <br /><br />May we all find ourselves overwhelmed by His love in a moment alone with him. Just as my children understand unconditional love in a quiet moment alone with me. May we find ourselves wrapped in the loving arms of Jesus today.<br /><br />As always, feel free to leave a comment, prayer request or message. God bless you!Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-33000240591905775902009-03-04T22:22:00.002-05:002009-03-04T22:31:09.198-05:00The Joys of Motherhood<div><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:85%;">Lately I have been struck with how much I have begun to look at motherhood as a job. Have you ever felt that way? Only it isn't an 8 hour job, it is an 18 hour job (if everyone sleeps through the night). And you don't clock out until the last door to the last bedroom is shut at the end of the day. Phew, what a sigh of relief that can be!<br /><br />I have found lately that I spend so much time doing things FOR my kids that sometimes I forget to do things WITH my kids. It is hard to not think that way when you give give give day in and day out. I decided the other day that I was going to start saying "yes" to my kids more. So often I find myself saying "just a minute" or "hold on" or even "no", when I really could have stopped what I was doing and said "yes". </span></div> <div> </div> <div><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:85%;">Yesterday my four year old stopped me in my tracks with one sentence. She said "mommy you don't ever play with us". That broke my heart. I had to stop and think, "when did I stop playing with them and why?" So today instead of just getting puzzles out for for my 2 year old to play with, I sat and watched her as she pieced them together. She is amazing. She puts 24 piece puzzles together all by herself! Ones that even I have to stop and think about at times! <br /><br />Later in my day when my oldest daughter was busy with something and my two youngest started to fight. Instead of getting frustrated with them, I decided to play "duck duck goose". I only had to play for a few minutes to make their day. And it was actually a lot of fun.<br /><br />Come to think of it, I even started my day off differently today than I normally do. I sat at the table with the girls while they ate breakfast. I am the kind of person who likes quiet in the morning. I make my coffee and retreat to a quiet place in the house while my girls eat cereal and giggle and laugh and make a racket in the kitchen. Today I just sat and listened to them. I drank my coffee and realized that someday the sound of them around the table in the morning will be a distant memory and I will regret that I didn't sit down and enjoy it more often.<br /><br /></span></div> <div><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:85%;">So today was a day with a whole lot of little adjustments in it. It only took away from what I was trying to get done for a few minutes of the day. Overall it wasn't a huge sacrifice, but in the end, it made a HUGE difference. I was in a better mood and the kids had a great day. They even loved on me more than usual. My seven year old came up to me out of nowhere and threw her arms around my neck and just said "I love you mom". And then she just stood at my side with her arms around me. She isn't very affectionate normally, so this melted my heart. As I gave little things to them through out the day, they automatically gave right back.</span></div> <div> </div> <div><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:85%;">Sometimes in the day to day routine of being a stay at home, home schooling mom, it can get overwhelming to try and invest in my children. There are days when I know I am just waiting for my husband to walk in the door so he can take over some of the chaos. But then there are days like today. Days when I stop and just listen to the sound of my children laughing. Days when a hug around the neck changes my heart in a significant way.<br /><br /> I have decided that the effort it takes to make those kinds of days happen more often will be well worth it. I know that tomorrow I might wake up and want my coffee in peace and quiet. And that is <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">ok</span>, I might just drink it alone tomorrow. But I want to make sure that I stop and think about it before I make that decision. I want to stop each morning and ask myself "when was the last time..." When was the last time I kicked the ball to my daughter rather than just suggesting she play with it? When was the last time I played in the fort after I got done building it? When was the last time I colored in a coloring book or painted a picture with my children? I want to start saying "yes" more often.<br /><br />I hope you find yourself thinking twice before saying "hold on" to your own children. I hope we can all stop and take a minute to realize that those things that keep us so busy all day, will someday be nothing. But our children, whom we often put off, will mean the world to us. I want to start living my days as though it is my last. I want to close out my day with no regrets. I want to become the mother I know God wants me to be. I hope you do to! God bless you as you bless your families!<br /></span></div>Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-30272712476914117522009-02-10T09:56:00.002-05:002009-02-10T10:34:02.023-05:00Who is God anyway?Today I have been thinking a lot about Job. A man in the bible who was just walking through is blessed life, living for God. He had amazing faith, prayed for his 10 children and managed his wealth in a way that honored God. Then one day he lost it all. His children died, his wealth was gone, his life was in ruins. All he was left with was a nagging wife who told him to give up and die. Oh the despair of Job's life.<br /><br />So what was the point? Why did God allow Job to face such difficult trials? If God loved Job so much why all the heartache? Ever feel that way? Like life goes from one big mess to another? Like the trials seem to run into each other and you just can't figure out why you are going through it all?<br /><br />I am sure that God had a lot of reasons for letting Job go through his heart breaking life. I am sure he was doing things we can't even begin to understand. But today there is one reason I can't get away from. I believe God wanted to show Job who He really was. <br /><br />Job was a man of great faith. After all, that is the reason Satan wanted to attack his life and try to destroy him. In the words of Job's wife, Satan's goal was to get Job to "curse God and die".<br /><br />Chapter after chapter the book of Job is full of the discussions Job had with his "friends" as they questioned why God would allow these horrible things to happen to Job. What sin could he be hiding to deserve the judgment of God like this? What had Job done to displease God? Over and over his friends came up with their theology and their reasons for why God would do this. Over and over Job answered with his own thoughts and beliefs. The whole book is basically man's best attempt at understand why God does what he does. And that is where the problem lies. Man will never be God, we will never fully understand his perspective. <br /><br />And so I see the book of Job in a new light today. I am looking at this man's life who was full of despair and loss and trials he couldn't have imagined facing and I see that, if for no other reason, maybe God chose to take him down this path to show him who He was. Maybe, just maybe, the whole point of the trial was so that God could reveal himself to Job. <br /><br />As Job and his friends debate you can almost see the revelations Job received. Job 9:30-33 says "If I wash myself with snow water, and make my hands ever so clean; Yet I will be plunged in a ditch, and my own clothes will abhor me. For he is not a man, as I am, that I should answer Him, and we should come together in judgment. Neither is there any daysman between us, that might lay his hand upon us both." And Job 16:17 says "My friends scorn me: but mine eyes pour out tears unto God. Oh that one might plead for a man with God, as a man pleads for his neighbor." Job saw that he was unclean. That his sins could not be washed away in his own strength. He knew that there was no way to reach out to God with out help. He longed for someone to stand between him and God and plead his case. <br /><br />In Job 19:25 Job sees a glimpse of Jesus and that he would indeed stand between man and God. He says "For I know that my redeemer lives, and that he shall stand at that latter day upon the earth." He declares his faith in a God he can barely glimpse by saying in Job 1:21 "Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord". As he and his friends debate the question of why, Job begins to see that it is the wrong question. Rather he needs to be asking "who?" Who is God? Who is he really? Do we really know Him? Do we really see Him for who he is? Do we have a revelation of the Redeemer who lives? Do we realize that He is so much greater and so much higher than we can fathom?<br /><br />God speaks to Job at the end of the book. He shows Job that in all his knowledge of God, he still didn't really know Him. And maybe, just maybe, this trial taught Job the greatest lesson of all. To not ask "why?" but "who?" To not seek the answers to why we are going through what we are going through, but to settle in our hearts that whatever may came our way, we will seek the very heart of God. That we will seek to know Him more. To find his heart in the midst of the storm. To look for the Redeemer who lives in the midst of our heart ache and to cling to Him.<br /><br />So today, no matter what you face, ask yourself "Who is God anyway?" Do I really know Him like I think I do? And embrace your trials as a chance to know your God more. For God longs to reveal Himself to you. He wants to pour Himself into you and build a firm foundation for you to stand on in any storm you face.<br /><br />May God bless you as you seek Him in your storm.Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-89369455139345773802008-12-31T10:20:00.002-05:002008-12-31T10:46:55.092-05:00A Prayer From Years Past<span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 0);">This morning I was going through some old papers I have from High School. I found all kinds of poems and songs and things I had written to express my heart. It was amazing to read things I had written as a teenager and to have all the old memories become crystal clear again. I wanted to share something I wrote entitled simply "A Prayer". </span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: verdana; font-style: italic;font-size:100%;" ><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 102);">Feb 28, 1993</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 102);">A Prayer</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 102);">Lord-</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 102);">It seems just last week I prayed You'd build a protective wall around me. A wall that would keep people far enough away that I'd never get really hurt again. Well, now You've opened my eyes and I realized I've built a wall on my own. And unfortunately, somehow, I find You got shoved just outside the wall. Without realizing it, I've built the wall around myself, all on my own. A wall of fear, uncertainty, worry, insecurity, stress and worst of all, loneliness.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 102);">I see myself peeping over the wall wondering how it could have happened so fast. When I realize its been growing steadily for sometime. I've blocked You and everyone else out for so long I didn't even notice the wall is so high I can barely look over it. How could I have let this happen? When I prayed for protection I didn't see what I should have asked for. I didn't need a wall, but Your love. </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 102);">No matter what happens, a wall will only hurt me, but Your love can heal me. I don't need a stack of bricks as cold as ice around my heart to protect me, I need Your love and forgiveness to heal my pain. </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 102);">Please, somehow, help me take my wall down and rebuild my self protection with Your love and assurence. Help me rely on You to fill my needs and help me deal with my problems instead of hiding behind my fortress of bitterness and anger. </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 102);">My walls will only crumple in on me if someone attacks me, but if I turn to You, and rely on Your grace to protect me, a person won't be able to reach the center of who I am, the soul of myself. </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 102);">I'll have my share of scrapes and bruises, but at least they'll get bandaged up by Your loving hands. Please open my eyes, ears, and heart to You.</span><br /></span><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 0);">What amazes me is that this cry for healing stayed in my heart for years. Then in 1998 God brought all that pain, all the hurt, fear and loneliness to a place of reckoning. I couldn't keep walking in my brokenness and a cry to be made whole consumed my heart. God gave me a promise that summer that he would "make me whole".</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 0);">Now a decade later I am preparing to teach a bible study to women about being made whole. I know that I still have issues I struggle with, but I can see how God truly has made my heart whole in so many ways. All the bitterness, anger and hurt that used to fill my life seem like a vague memory. When I stop and search my heart of hearts I find a deep and everlasting love that has become a foundation to stand on in any storm. God truly has traded all my sorrows for joy. I have so much to be thankful for.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 0);">This New Year's Eve I don't have any thoughts of what this year might hold. I don't know what trials or joys may come my way. But I do know where I have come from. I know that God has delivered me out of some very dark pits and set my feet on the rock of His love. I know that He will never forsake me or leave me. That His heart for me is consumed with an everlasting love with no end. And because of that, I can rejoice in the upcoming year. It is in the hands of a might God who loves me eternally.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 0);">No matter what our new year might bring our way, I pray that you find your heart and life filled with unexpected blessings. That you will know God's love in a new and deeper way. God Bless You!!!!</span><br /><br />Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-61838799335195166312008-12-16T22:23:00.002-05:002008-12-16T22:51:29.530-05:00A Sister in Need<span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">This Christmas I have been thinking about the Christmas story in a new way. I was asked to speak at our church's Women's Ministry Christmas party last week. As I prepared to speak I kept reading through the Christmas story wondering if there was an angle in it for women. And not just the "tried and true" faithful Mary story. God began to show me something that really blessed me. I didn't end up speaking on it at the party, but want to share it with all of you who read my blog.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">Believe it or not there is women's ministry in the story of Christmas. It is found in the relationship between Mary and Elisabeth. The young girl, Mary, was in a terrible crisis in her life. She was </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">bearly</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"> a teenager and finds herself the fulfillment of the greatest prophecies of all time. She is going to bear a child out of wedlock. What to think about that! She is thrilled, but as she tells her parents and betrothed she finds herself in a battle that overwhelms her. Imagine what her parents thought? They must have been so humiliated, hurt and angry with her. I doubt they believed her story, would you? Then there is Joseph. The young, trusting fiance who has devoted his life and future to her. We all know that he was thrown for a loop! He must have said some pretty hurtful things in his own pain and </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">confusion</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">. So all of that leaves us with one very hurt young girl who, most likely, hadn't had to face a trial this fierce in her whole life. She is, after all, just a teenager. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">Who does Mary turn to in her time of need? Her parents whom she has always been able to trust and run to with her problems? Her future husband who is suppose to love and cherish her til "death do us part"? These people have all disappointed and hurt her. Who can she possibly turn to? </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">This is where the story leads us to Elisabeth. A woman who has lived life. She has faced the shame of being childless. She has had to live with all the whispers of the neighbors. She has had to ignore the looks of mothers as they pass her in the street and wonder what sin Elisabeth could possibly have committed to deserve the curse of barrenness. She has had to live with the ache in her heart of unfulfilled dreams. She has had to learn how to fill her life with God and not the things of this world. She also has something in common with Mary. She too, has the promise from an angel that she will bear a special son of prophecy. She too, has had to stand in faith on God's word when all seemed impossible. She is on the other side of the trial, realizing the blessing of God's faithfulness. She is the perfect person for Mary to run to to find comfort and strength.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">So Mary packs her bags and heads out on the long journey to visit Elisabeth. She is weary, tired, and in the greatest trial of her life. She arrives at Elisabeth's door and is </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">greeted</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"> with encouragement, affirmation, and the very heart of God for her. Yes the child she bears is indeed the Messiah, the coming savior. Elisabeth's greeting so encouraged Mary that she breaks out in praises to God. In fact this is one of the only times you will see a song of praise written out in the </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">Gospels</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"> (Zachariah says one at the birth of John as well). We don't know all of what Elisabeth said to Mary in that moment. The </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">Gospels</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"> are very brief in her comments. But we do know that Mary begins to praise God for who he is and what he is doing through her life and her trial. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">Mary spent three months living with Elisabeth. Three months being encouraged, strengthened and prayed for. Three months of listening to the wisdom of Elisabeth. Three months of being told she is indeed carrying the Messiah. What an amazing gift Elisabeth gave to Mary. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">So the question I have for you is: Are you a Mary or an Elisabeth right now? Are you in a trial you feel you can't bear on your own? Are you someone who has </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">encouragement</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"> and strength to offer other women in need? We all need </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">each other</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"> so much. As women we especially need the strength that comes from other women. We can be such a blessing to </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">each other</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"> if we are willing to risk a little and give from our hearts.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">And so this Christmas I challenge you to see who you can reach out to. Or who you can trust with your burden. We need </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">each other</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"> and we need to be reminded of just how awesome our God is.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">If you are feeling discouraged and overwhelmed know that Jesus wasn't just a baby born in a manger, he came to be your healer, the lifter of your burdens, and the one you can trust your heart to. Even if you don't have an Elisabeth in your life right now, you have the love of Almighty God reaching out to you in the gift of his son. And he does love you, with an everlasting love. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">Let me know if you need any prayer! Leave an anonymous comment or share your heart with others in a comment</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">And Merry Christmas!</span>Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-46679088081518176772008-11-02T22:15:00.003-05:002008-11-03T06:58:57.524-05:00The Still Small VoiceTonight as I put the girls to bed I had a wonderful conversation with them about the presence of God. I just wanted to share with you the truth that struck me as so simple, and yet so profound.<br /><br />Lately I have been trying to get my girls to understand that when we pray, it is like talking to Jesus. I want them to understand that we don't just pray with them as a nice bedtime routine. I have been trying to explain to Alanna what it is like to feel the presence of God in your heart. How do you describe to a 7 year old what the peace of God feels like? Or how the Holy Spirit can move on your heart? These abstract concepts are so vital for our walk with God that I tremble at the thought of somehow not teaching my children how to experience God for themselves.<br /><br />As I was trying to explain to the girls the stillness that God brings to your heart when you pray, a story came to mind. The story of Elijah and the presence of God. Elijah was hiding from Jezebel when God shows up. First, there was a mighty wind that tore at the mountain, but God wasn't in the raging wind. Then there was an earthquake that shook the very ground Elijah stood on, but God wasn't in the earthquake. Next there was a fire that could consume in a minute with it's mighty heat, but God wasn't in the fire. God is almighty, all consuming, he can do anything, be anything, but he chose not reveal his presence in these powerful forces. Finally, Elijah heard a still small voice. It was when he heard the gentle voice, that Elijah stepped out from where he was hiding and spoke directly with God. He found God in the stillness, in a quiet place.<br /><br />As I related this story to the girls I asked myself "why would God choose a still small voice?" He could choose to reveal himself in anything, why in a whisper? In my heart of hearts I knew why, but I had never tried to simplify it for a child to understand. So I explained it the only way I knew how.<br /><br />I was telling the girls that God's voice is like a gentle whisper that calls to you. I was talking in a hushed voice for affect. I explained that God could shout if he wanted to. He could make it really easy for anyone to hear him by yelling out to us, but he chooses to whisper to our hearts. I related God's still small voice to our "secrets" game. You see, as a family, we have great fun telling each other "secrets". We will cup our hand over our mouth and tell one of the girls that we have a secret for them. Their eyes light up and they come running over to hear what the secret will be. Most of the time we just whisper "I love you". But sometime we will have a sweet message to share with them.<br /><br />As I related our whisper game to God I asked them a few questions. I asked if they loved me. They said yes. I asked if they liked it when I whispered a special message just for them to hear. Again their answer was yes. Then I asked if they would hear my secret if they were busy with other things and running around playing. They said no. I asked if they liked it when I shouted or yelled at them, again the answer was no. It was at this point I explained to them that it is the same with God. He will gently tug on our hearts with a still small voice. He will call our name and see if we will stop long enough to hear his voice. And if we love him, we will want to stop everything to hear what he has to say to us, just like they do when we play our secrets game. I explained that often Jesus is just calling us to stop and listen so he can tell us just how much he loves us. It may be through a scripture, or a song, or just a gentle knowing that his love is everlasting and that it is toward us. I explained that His presence is that quiet stillness we feel when we stop and pray. It is the calm that fills our heart and soul when we lean real close to hear the quiet whisper from the heart of God.<br /><br />As I type this I, myself, am convicted by how busy I get in my own life and miss that gentle calling. I am going to make an effort to stop this week and hear what Jesus is trying to whisper to me. He may just be saying he loves me, or he may have something profound to show my heart. Whatever it is, if it is from God, I don't want to miss it!<br /><br />I hope you find yourself stopping to lean in and hear what the very heart of God is saying to you this week!Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-64242684206631113272008-09-16T14:30:00.002-04:002008-09-16T15:18:42.341-04:00Are We Desperate Enough for Him?Well here is my second blog entry on my bible study "Being made whole". Usually when I write a blog post I am all excited and have some passion about what I am writing. Today I am more walking in faith. Which is really quite ironic... well you will see as you read why stepping out in faith is fitting for this blog entry!<br /><br />I recently told a friend who just started reading my blog about what this entry was going to be about. I told her it was the one story of the 9 I am studying that I dreaded the most. It is the story of the Gentile woman who begs Jesus to heal her daughter and Jesus calls her a dog! Yikes... where do you go with that one? But really it is quite a fitting story for each and every one of us. So I hope you can relate to the story where Jesus calls a woman a dog! (Mt 15:21-31)<br /><br />The story starts on the coasts of Tyre and <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Sidon</span> just north of Israel. The woman who seeks Jesus out was a <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Canaanite</span> woman, a gentile and a pagan. Her daughter is possessed and she is desperate for her to be healed. She has heard of Jesus and his <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">healings</span>. She hears that he has traveled to the boarders of her country and so she immediately sets off to find the only person who can help her, the messiah<br /><br />The woman has traveled to find Jesus and as she sees him in the distance she begins to cry in a loud voice "Have mercy on me, O Lord, Son of David! My daughter is possessed by a demon!" She recognized that she needed God's mercy in her life, she was desperate for it. She also knew Jesus was the messiah. Son of David is a title used for the messiah. But she made the claim for him to be her Lord as well. Her master. Here she is crying out with all her heart, in desperation for God's mercy, and what does Jesus do? Ignore her.<br /><br />Have you ever felt like that? Like you have poured out your heart to God and yet he seems so far away? I sure have. And not just once or twice, but over and over again. Again and again in my life I have related to the prophet Jeremiah when he says "Even when I cry and shout for help, He shuts out my prayer." or "You have covered Yourself with a cloud so that no prayer can pass through" (Lam 3:8,44). It is a terrifying feeling to cry out to God in desperation and not feel his presence or hear an answer.<br /><br />And how do the disciples respond to her cries for help? Do they tell Jesus "Help this poor distraught mother, she is begging you to help her" ? NO! They tell Jesus to get rid of her. She is driving them crazy with all her shouting. Sometimes the body of Christ can be like this. It can really hurt when people don't understand why we are crying out to God so desperately.<br /><br />I can remember two times in my life when people came to me and asked me why I was crying out to God like I was. The first time was when I was in <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">high school</span>. I had a pretty rough <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">home life</span> and it seemed every altar call was for me. I was so hungry for Jesus and in such desperate need of his mercy in my life. I remember a friend telling me that he and his mother were wondering why in the world I kept going up to all the altar calls. It was like a slap in my face. You can imagine I held back going to the altar for the rest of the time I attended that church. Another time I was in a season of deep healing with God. He was teaching me to forgive those who had abused me over the years. I spent more days than not with tears in my eyes. I had a respected leader in my life ask me why I was always crying. Again it was slap in my face! God was doing so much in my heart I couldn't help but cry all the time! To this day I have a hard time going up to for an altar call or asking for prayer because of these <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">incidents</span>. I pray I never discourage someone desperate for Jesus to cry out to Him!<br /><br />So I ask, could this story get worse? Here she is crying out to Jesus, He is ignoring her and the disciples are trying to get rid of her. What more could go wrong to discourage her? The woman sees that she isn't getting any results from crying out, so she decides to draw near to him. Jesus' silence has provoked her to seek him. To draw closer to Him. <br /><br />The gentile woman finally reaches Jesus and she kneels down at his feet, worships him and <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">pleads</span> with Jesus "Lord help me". You would think Jesus would gently put a hand on her head, tell her to rise up, her daughter is healed. Isn't that the Jesus we know? The ever patient and loving God who never turns a hurt soul away? But what does he say to her? "it is not right to take the children's bread and throw it to the dogs" (15:26). <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">OK</span>, I don't know about you, but if I was that lady, I would have turn around and run home with tears streaming down my face! Jesus just called her a dog! That was a derogatory term used to describe a gentile pagans in those days. Perhaps you could think of a few <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">derogatory</span> names people use to describe others that aren't like them. It was not a compliment in the least.<br /><br />But what does the woman do? She <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">acknowledges</span> that she is a dog. She knows she is nothing in and of herself. She knows that she is not worthy of Jesus. She knows that she is relying solely on his mercy. She believes that even just a "crumb" from God will solve her problems (15:27)<br /><br />Are we in a place where we know we are nothing? I seem to go through phases in my walk. It seems that there are layers of knowing my own worthless heart is hopeless w/o His mercy. I suppose if I saw all the areas of my heart at once I would be undone. The question isn't whether our heart is unworthy, the question is what we do when we realize we are unworthy. Do we prostrate ourselves before Jesus in worship and tell him that all we ask for is his mercy as this woman did? Or do we turn and run and feel sorry for ourselves?<br /><br />Jesus was not trying to be mean to this woman. He was just doing what God does best, drawing her to an intimate place of worship with Him. Sometimes God has to seem silent or uncaring to us so that we will press in to seek him more. Sometimes he makes it seem like our prayers are hitting the ceiling and bouncing back to us, so that we will run to him and cry out all the more.<br /><br />Finally Jesus turns to the woman and tells her that incredible faith in him and he makes her daughter whole. He wasn't ignoring her, he wasn't putting her down, he was reaching into her heart to find her faith. And he was not disappointed. <br /><br />Earlier I said that I could relate to Jeremiah in Lam 3. I could understand his despair. But in the middle of that chapter there is an amazing picture of hope and grace. Lam 3:18-26 says:<br /><br /><span style="color:#990000;">My strength and my hope is perished from the LORD:<br />Remembering mine affliction and my misery, the wormwood and the gall.<br />My soul hath them still in remembrance, and is humbled in me.<br />This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope.<br />It is of the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed, because his <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">compassions</span> fail not.<br />They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.<br />The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him.<br />The LORD is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11">seeketh</span> him.<br />It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the LORD. </span><br /><span style="color:#990000;"></span><br /><span style="color:#000000;">I know I refer to that scripture a lot, but God has written it so deep with in my heart that I can't ever seem to get away from it. When everything seems dark and despair crushes in. When God seems so far away I wonder if I will ever feel or hear from Him again. When the night feels like it will never give way to the morning. Or when my tears feel like they will never return to joy. Well, that is when I remind myself, His mercies are new every morning. Great is his faithfulness.</span><br /><br />If you feel like the gentile woman today. If you feel like God isn't listening, or that everyone is looking at you wondering why in the world you are crying out to God. If you have found that your heart is more wretched than you dreamed it could be and you feel like you should give up. Take hope. He is silent so you will seek him. He allows the trial to draw you in to a deeper place in him. He has a revelation for you in this time. He desires to make you whole. <br /><br />May you be blessed with a touch of mercy today.Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-90698902234397807002008-09-01T21:38:00.003-04:002008-09-01T23:04:32.170-04:00True RestI am finally getting a chance to write my first post on being "made whole". I want to start this post by being honest. The last few weeks have been really hard for me. I feel like I have been through the ringer emotionally and spiritually. I know that it is God's mercy digging into my heart and changing me to be more like him. There have been moments that I wished it could be done with a little more ease!<br /><br />What I want to share with you is out of Mt 12, Mk 6 and Lu 6. It is the story of the man with the withered hand. The story starts well before Jesus arrives at the synagogue and meets the man. It starts on the road as Jesus and the disciples walk to town. <br /><br />Imagine Jesus and his closest friends walking to service that morning. It is the sabbath and they haven't had anything to eat. Instead of providing his followers with a miraculous meal of loaves and fishes, he and his disciples just pick some corn from a field. The Pharisees must have been walking down the same road to the synagogue that morning, because they see Jesus and his disciples breaking their rules on what can be done on the sabbath. I say "their rules" because it wasn't scripture that forbade the harvesting of a meal on the sabbath, but the laws that had been added to scripture. <br /><br />The Pharisees stop and rebuke Jesus for what He has done. You almost have to wonder what Jesus was thinking at this point. He defends his actions by quoting scriptures that refer to King David and the Priesthood breaking the laws as well. Then He says He is the Son of Man and the Lord of the Sabbath. Basically He tells the Pharisees that He is the messiah and has more of a right to break their laws than David or the Priests did. After all He is the Lord of the Sabbath. You have to realize this didn't go over well with the Pharisees<br /><br />This is where we get to the story of the man with the withered hand. Imagine the Pharisees return to the synagogue fuming mad. How dare Jesus rebuke them like that and make those claims! So they decide to set him up. If he is who he says he is, then let him prove it. They decide to trap him and accuse him of breaking the sabbath in front of everyone by putting the one thing before Jesus they know he won't pass by. A crippled man.<br /><br />I have no idea how they persuaded the man to go along with their plan. Maybe they just ordered him to go inside. Cripples weren't allowed in places of worship. Maybe they bribed him or threatened him. In the end it doesn't really matter. Here was this man with a withered hand standing in the midst of the crowd when Jesus and his disciples arrive. Lu 6:6 says it was the man's right hand that was crippled. In Jewish teachings the right hand was the hand of strength and blessing. Scripture often refers to God's right hand. It was a symbol of strength. So here is this man whose very ability to work and function as a normal person was withered up. His strength was withered and gone.<br /><br />I wonder how this man felt? He must have known he was being used to set Jesus up. Was he afraid Jesus would just walk by and ignore him? Maybe he was even more afraid Jesus would stop and notice him.<br /><br />Have you ever felt like an area of you life was just withered and dried up? Like your strength was just gone? Have you ever been so ashamed of your lack of strength that you just wanted to hide your weakness from everyone, even Jesus? Can you relate to this man? I know I can! I have been relating to him every day for the last few weeks! <br /><br />So how did Jesus respond to this situation? He knows the Pharisees want to entrap Him and He sees their hard hearts. Mk 3:5 even says He was angry with them. Jesus chose to completely ignore the Pharisees. He was more concerned about the man with the withered hand.<br /><br />Jesus asked the man to do something amazing here. In Lu 6:8 it says that he turned to the man and told him to rise up, step forward, and stand in the midst of the crowd. I am sure this is the last thing the man wanted to do! But he listened to Jesus and stepped out. <br /><br />Then Jesus does something even more amazing. He speaks to the Pharisees. In Mt 12:11 it says Jesus asks the Pharisees if it would be lawful to find a lost sheep on the sabbath. The answer is, or course, yes. I imagine this crippled man is feeling very much like a lost sheep. He is exposed and on display for all the world to see. He must have felt not only like a lost sheep, but like a lost sheep surrounded by wolves waiting to devour him! But Jesus doesn't ask him to stand there alone, he is at his side, standing with him. Jesus is being the shepherd to this man and protecting him from the wolves in his greatest moment of weakness. <br /><br />Jesus continues by asking if it is better to do good on the sabbath, or evil, to give life or destroy it. He exposes the very heart of the Pharisees. Here are the Pharisees in all their self righteousness and pride, devouring this poor innocent man for their own plans of evil and Jesus calls them on it! He doesn't expose the heart of the crippled man, though I am sure he had areas of sin that needed to be dealt with. Rather he exposed the wolves for who they were and protected the sheep when he was weakest. <br /><br />Praise God Jesus does that for us. When he shows us our weakness he also stands by our side protecting us from the accusers and the wolves in our own lives. Sometimes our own guilt and shame can devour us more than anyone else ever could. But Jesus never leaves our side. He is the good shepherd and will protect us as if we were a lost sheep.<br /><br />The man now knows that Jesus is standing by him as he is made vulnerable before the crowd. He understands that he is like the lost sheep and Jesus is that great shepherd protecting and saving him. So it is no wonder when Jesus asks him to do one last thing, he doesn't hesitate. And yet this is the hardest thing of all. Jesus asks the man to stretch forth his hand. To display for all to see the depths of his weakness. To be vulnerable and exposed. To bear his very heart before Jesus. But as he trusts Jesus and stretches out his greatest weakness to him, Jesus makes him whole. <br /><br />The story in Matt concludes with a prophecy about Jesus "...a bruised reed shall he not break, and a smoking flax shall he not quench..." I have always loved this verse. Have you ever found a flower or plant that has been stepped on? Or maybe someone bent the stem of a flower just enough that you can see the bruises on it. It isn't quite broken, but it isn't strong any longer either. Or have you ever seen a candle with a wick just about to burn out? Maybe there is barley a glow left on the wick and it is just smoking, no longer producing light. That is what this verse is talking about. When we are at our end. When our strength is gone. When we feel stepped on and like our light is just about burnt out. Jesus never breaks the bruised reed and he would never put out the smoking flax. He desires to heal and restore and to strengthen.<br /><br />Earlier in the story Jesus told the Pharisees he was Lord of the Sabbath. If you read back just a few verses further you find in Mt 11:28-30 Jesus says "Come to me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light". Jesus' heart is to give rest to the weary and strength to the weak. <br /><br />As I thought about this I remembered Hebrews 4. It is the chapter about the ultimate Sabbath we find in Jesus, the rest for the people of God. Heb 4:9 says "there remains a rest to the people of God". <br /><br />Verse 11 continues that we must labor to enter into that rest. Labor to rest? That doesn't sound right? But as I thought about this and related it to the story I began to see a beautiful truth. One God has been trying to pound into my thick head for years. If you labor in good works and are always trying to be better and make you self into a perfect person, you will burn yourself out. There is no rest in a life of striving. That is living under the law and will burden you and bind you up. But I began to think about faith and trust in Jesus. Those words sound so easy. But are they? I find the deeper I look into my heart the harder it can be to trust and have faith. I find that being vulnerable before him, trusting him and having faith require quite a bit of effort on my part. You could say I labor in faith and trust in him. But when I do.... oh the sweet rest that comes over my soul. The peace that fills me. The storm could be raging all around me and it doesn't matter. If I am looking to Jesus and trusting him, there is rest and peace. But you have to labor to keep that trust and faith in him. Life will do its best to shake it!<br /><br />Hebrews continues in vs 12&13 to talk about how the word is sharper than any two edged sword and discerns the very thoughts and intents of our hearts. That all things are naked and opened to God. This is shown so clearly in this story. Jesus spoke and the very hearts of the Pharisees were exposed. He also exposed the very weakness of the crippled man. With one word God will expose our own hearts. He will show us things we wish weren't there. But as in the story, Jesus never exposes weakness just to expose it. His desire is to heal it. To make us whole.<br /><br />In the end all our faith, our labor to trust him, our weakness being exposed, are for one purpose. That we might "come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need" (Heb 4:16)<br /><br />These last few weeks have been a time of great weakness in my life. There have been days when the battle in my heart was so strong that I didn't know how I was going to find the strength to finish the day. But I spent every ounce of strength I did have, in a labor of faith and trust in Jesus. No matter how weak I got in my battle, I found a rock solid peace in my heart of hearts. And through that peace came a rest and even more faith.<br /><br />Like the crippled man, when we have lost all strength, we must trust God. When his word exposes our weaknesses, we must have faith to step out and make ourselves vulnerable before him. To allow his word to make us "naked and open" before him. It can be a scary feeling. It can hurt tremendously. It becomes a labor of faith and trust. But there is a promise that we will find rest and even more amazing, that we can come before him boldly! Even in our weakness we can come to him and boldly ask for grace and mercy in our time of need!<br /><br />And so, by faith, I step out like the cripple man and stretch my greatest weaknesses toward God. I choose to trust him in this storm and know that he will stand by my side protecting me and in the end, healing me. It will all be worth it to be made whole.<br /><br />Please don't hesitate to let me know if you need prayer!Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-84438738042415834372008-08-08T08:02:00.003-04:002008-08-08T08:28:16.853-04:00It has been a whileI am back! I know it has been a while since I last posted on my blog. Life has been crazy for me this summer. But I am back and hope to update my blog frequently this fall, so check in and find some encouragement when you need it!<br /><br />I am going to ask you for prayer in the coming months. I recently volunteered myself to teach a wed night bible study at our church. I will be teaching my class in January. If this was a normal study I probably wouldn't be asking you to pray for me, but this is anything but an ordinary bible study. You see God birthed it in my spirit and I am writing it from my heart. It is something God has been speaking to me for years and is finally coming together. I know that over the next few months as I research, study and pray this bible study is going to rip my heart open and do a deep work in places I would probably rather leave untouched. You see the bible study is on "being made whole".<br /><br />Years ago when I spent one of my summers in NYC working for Times Square Church God began to stir a cry in my heart to be "made whole". I was raised in a rather <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0"><span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">dysfunctional</span></span> home with the typical sad story of divorce, alcoholism, abuse, remarriage, more abuse, and my share of rejection. The toll it took on my heart and spirit is like the toll it takes on anyone. It left me crippled. I spent so many years limping around feeling like a lame man in my relationships, like a bleeding woman with more than one issue draining my heart, and a blind man groping for hope in a dark world. So that summer in NYC (1998 I believe) God began to stir my heart with a cry to be made whole. That I wouldn't just be healed of the scars, but that my heart and soul would be made complete... whole. God also made a promise to me that he would do just that, heal me completely. So for years I have stood in faith that he would set me free and that one day (this side of heaven) I would be able to say with confidence that I was whole.<br /><br />Several years ago as I continued down my own path of healing God began to speak to me about a bible study. This study would go through 9 <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">healings</span></span> where the phrase "made whole" is used. I began to study the first healing of the woman with the issue of blood and it changed my life. Unfortunately after I completed that first lesson the bible study got shelved. Then a few months ago God began to ask me to pull it out again and to begin working on it. I knew he wanted me to step up and ask my pastor if I could teach one of the wed night classes at our church. After a lot of wrestling with my low self esteem and more than my share of lies about what God really wanted, I volunteered myself to lead the study.<br /><br />As I have begun to dig into the other <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">healings</span></span> in the study I am finding that my heart is being exposed to the light of God's word. Oh the depths that hide with in my own heart! Yet I am excited to see what weaknesses are lurking in my heart. To know what areas cripple and hinder me. I know that God doesn't reveal these things to tear us down. He exposes them to heal us and set us free. And quite frankly, I am tired of limping through my life with scars from my past and wounds from abuse affecting every area of my life. Especially my family. My husband doesn't deserve my past, my children don't deserve my past, and quite frankly I don't want it any more.<br />So pray for me. Pray as I press into His word and seek the truth that will set me free. As I study I will post my lessons for you to read as well. I hope that someone out there will need the truths as desperately as I do. Perhaps my journey of healing can be your journey as well. I would also love to hear from you. Your insight into the study might be a valuable part of my research. I can't do this alone!<br /><br />So be patient with me as I wrestle through this study and post my findings. Pray for me. And by all means, let me know what you think!Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-79803495513411934262008-05-18T14:32:00.002-04:002008-05-18T15:02:57.501-04:00In His StrengthI am half laughing to myself as I sit to write this latest post. This blog is for me to be transparent and to encourage other mom's. Well, sometimes it isn't easy to be transparent. But I made a promise to myself and God that I would work at that more... so here goes.<br /><br />This week was not the easiest for me. It wasn't the worst week ever, but it was one of "those" weeks. You know what I am talking about! It was the kind of week where you wake up in the morning and pray that you would love your children more. That you will be more patient, never raise your voice, and actually play with your children and enjoy it. And then the children wake up and, boom it is like all those prayers vanish and your nasty old self shows its ugly face and you wonder what in the world happened between 6 and 7 am! I think I have felt that way every day this week! Just worn down and frazzled and wondering what happened to my joy.<br /><br />Today God reminded me it isn't about feelings. Sometimes we forget that feelings and faith are not intertwined. Oh if you ask me, I will always say faith is not about how one feels, but about who God is. But if you look deep in my heart? Well, faith is a whole lot easier if you feel the joy and hope and love! This week I felt anything but joyful! All the encouragement I had been feeling lately, the closeness of God's love, the depth of His word in my heart, it all seemed to melt away. I began to question things I had felt God was speaking to me. I began to doubt the direction I felt God leading me in my life. I had begun to forget that this is a new start for me, a new phase in life, a year of Jubilee so to speak. <br /><br />Today God reminded me that it is all about Him, not about me. He is the God of all creation. He is the Almighty. He is ever faithful, full of mercy and grace and strength to help in my time of need. He is everlasting, holy, righteous and just. He is so much bigger than I give him credit for! God spoke a word to my heart today from Isaiah 40&41. I wanted to share it with you today.<br /><br /><span style="color:#990000;">"Hast thou not known? Hast thou not heard, that the everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, fainteth not, neither is weary? There is no searching of his understanding. He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength. Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall: But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint... Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness... For I the Lord thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear Not; I will help thee... When the poor and needy see water, and there is none, and their tongue faileth for thirst, I the Lord will hear them, I the God of Israel will not forsake them. I will open rivers in high places, and fountains in the midst of the valleys: I will make the wilderness a pool of water, and the dry land springs of water."</span><br /><br />God is eternal and almighty. He created the stars in the heavens and all that we see. He is so far above all we know and imagine. And he <em>promises</em> to give us strength. He says that we shouldn't fear. That he will revive us, fill us and keep us. That he has water for the thirsty, strength for the weary and hope for the hopeless. He is not a man that he should lie! If he promises it to us, then it is true and we can stand on it. Oh how I needed to hear that today! <br /><br />This week I have been weary. I have been worn down and frustrated with my lack of joy and confidence in the Lord. I need to stop looking through the eyes of my feelings, and lift my head up! He is GOD. He is faithful when I am not. He is eternal and from everlasting to everlasting, who am I to doubt his word? So today I stand in faith that he will renew my strength, fill my wilderness with pools of water, and strengthen me in heart and spirit.<br /><br />If you are weary in your walk, if you are tired and worn down, join me in lifting your eyes up to the eternal God who loves you and promises to be your strength.<br /><br />God bless you this week. Let me know if you need prayer! And say a prayer for me as well. Thanks for your friendships.Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-81118245717783628772008-05-06T09:14:00.004-04:002008-05-06T09:30:48.512-04:00This too shall pass<span style="font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;color:#cc6600;">"To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven." Eccl 3:1</span><br /><br /><span style="color:#660000;">Last night my husband said something to me that so encouraged and yet saddened me. My oldest daughter had <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">whacked</span> her sister in the head with a baby doll "on accident". It, of course, ended up being a big ordeal (when isn't it?). My husband looked at me and said "You know, someday there will be a last time she does that". I didn't quite understand what he meant. He continued by explaining that someday there would be a last time that our girls hit <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">each other</span>. We won't recognize it at the time, but someday they will stop hitting <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">each other</span>. That is when it hit me. To everything there is a season.</span><br /><span style="color:#660000;"></span><br /><span style="color:#660000;">I know we moms like to encourage <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">each other</span> with the thought that "this too shall pass", but do we really think about what that means? There will be a day when your toddler wets his pants for that last time. There will be a day when you get up in the middle of the night with a sick child for the last time. There will be a day when you face that last childish argument and heave that sigh of frustration for the last time. And though that thought brings us great hope in the midst of the battle, last night it also brought me a bit of <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">sadness</span>. Someday they will be all grown up and I won't be able to call back all these days I have with them. They will be half forgotten memories that I will have to cherish.</span><br /><span style="color:#660000;"></span><br /><span style="color:#660000;">So remind yourself today that it might just be a "last day" for something. Maybe a moment that you won't mind seeing the last of, like my girls hitting <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">each other</span>. But maybe it will be a moment you will miss when it is gone. Like a last time your little child wants to climb in your lap and be held close instead of going to bed. Or the last time you read a story to your child. Or the last time your child runs to you with tears over a scraped knee. Those moments might stress us out now, but someday they will be just memories that we long for. </span><br /><span style="color:#660000;"></span><br /><span style="color:#660000;">So enjoy your children today. And cherish that "last time" if you recognize it for what it is. Our children are a precious gift from God. A gift meant to bless us and fill our lives with joy and meaning. Embrace those difficult moments knowing that someday "this too shall pass".</span><br /><span style="color:#660000;"></span><br /><span style="color:#660000;">May I remember my own words today!</span>Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-68362745504443516162008-05-03T22:29:00.002-04:002008-05-03T22:32:06.460-04:00One Mom to AnotherI want to hear from you. <br />What are you struggling with?<br />What has God encouraged you with lately?<br />Do you have practical advise for other moms? <br />Are you in need of prayer?<br /><br />Please feel free to leave a comment, story, thought, or prayer request! <br /><br />Be encouraged you aren't alone!Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-5276340623508468662008-04-30T10:39:00.002-04:002008-04-30T22:26:38.764-04:00HopeThis morning I was reading in Hebrews 8-13. I usually avoid Hebrews because it is so confusing to me. But this morning these chapters were so encouraging for me. I just wanted to write down my thoughts for anyone who is in a trial right now and needs their faith strengthened.<br /><br />In Hebrews there is a lengthy despcription of the old covenant under the law and a comparison to Jesus. You can get lost in all the refrences to the Old Testiment laws and rituals. But what struck me was just how futile it all was. The tabernacle was set up just so with all these instraments and sacrifices and offerings. Over and over the blood was shed, the offerings burnt, the blood was sprinkled, the prayers were made. And yet only once a year was one man (the high priest) allowed in the holy of holies, and he held his breath hoping he would live through the experience. There was such fear, so many things that had to be done right, so much depended on keeping the law.<br /><br />Ever felt like that in your walk with God? That if you could just get it right. If you could just read enough of your bible, pray the right prayers, do the right things, then, maybe just maybe, you would feel the guilt of your sins lift. We don't like to admit that we live like this. I will admit that I tend to fall into the trap. Going to Bible School helped show me my walk of works and legalism, but it didn't irradicate the mindset completely! I still fall into the cycle of works at times.<br /><br />Hebrews continues with a description of the perfect priest deciding he had had enough of a covenant that just wasn't working and decided to make a better covenant. (the failure of the first covenant was our fault entirely). So instead of offering sacrifices continually he just decided to give himself as the sacrifice to end all sacrifices. And the most beautiful part of it all? He didn't make that sacrifice so we could enter the holy of holies in a physical tabernacle. He made the sacrifice so we could go straight to the very throne of God. Heb 10:22 "let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience, an dour bodies washed with pure water" Heb 4:16 "Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need."<br /><br />Here is the part that encouraged me today. In Heb 11 you have the faith chapter. A lengthy despcription starting in Gen 1:1 with the creation, and listing all these people in the old testiment who lived by faith hoping in a promise they couldn't see. Men and women who knew God was there and wanted to serve him, but were bound by the old covenant and the futile sacrifices that kept them at arms length from God. Yet they had such faith! They trusted, they believed, they followed, they even died for a God they could bearly know.<br /><br />Hebrews continues in ch12 by encouraging us. We are surrounded by this cloud of witnesses who had so much faith, and yet never knew Jesus. A list of people too long to name who all stood in faith that God would make a way. If we have their example of faith, then where is our faith? We have the ultimate sacrifice, Jesus. He died to make a way into the very presence of a living God, not just into a small room with in the tabernacle that help the ark. He died and then rose and was seated on the throne so that he could fill us with his very spirit. God can now draw near to us and fill us and speak to us and lead us because of the sacrifice that Jesus made for us. 12:1 "wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily besets us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us"<br /><br />That hit me right in the heart. God has made a way for us to stand in faith that actually gets us to the very throne of God. He gave us a sacrifice once and for all not just to cleanse us from sin, but to open a door to His very heart. He is sitting there just waiting for us to run into his arms of love. In fact he is the very one who draws us to the place of seeking him in the first place.<br />I know what it is like to feel like your prayers hit the ceiling and fall flat at your feet. I know what it is like to be overwhelmed with depression and have no desire to reach beyond the dark cloud that sufficates you. I know what it is like to feel so much guilt and shame that you don't think God could ever possibly love you. I know what it is like to just want to give up.<br />But Hebrews continues in 12:12 "wherefore lift up the hands which hang down, and the feeble knees; And make straight paths for your feet, lest that which is lame be turned out of the way; but let it rather be healed"<br /><br />I want to strengthen any who are weary today. God's love is everlasting. His desire is toward you. He longs to embrace you with forgiveness and grace and strength in your weakness. He wants to consume you with himself.<br /><br />I am coming out of years of a dark battle that I felt would never end. In that battle I found God's love so pure and consuming that if it were not for his grace I would have been consumed. His mercies were new for me every morning and he was so very faithful (Lam 3). I hope you can find a sanctuary in your time of need today!<br /><br />Let me know if you need any prayers!Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3435098011156991565.post-86877281224131412862008-04-29T10:13:00.004-04:002008-05-07T10:17:11.579-04:00Hiding Behind a Mask<span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#660000;"><span style="font-family:verdana;">Recently I have noticed just how much people hide behind masks. No one is willing to be vulnerable or open any more. I have decided to start this blog as a way to strip my own mask off. A way for other mom's to safely talk about their struggles and find the support they need to get through them.<br /></span></span><br /><span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#660000;"><span style="font-family:verdana;">A few months ago I was at a marriage seminar with my husband. It was at this seminar that I saw how healing it can be for someone to be transparent. The couple teaching the seminar have grown kids and have been married for years. The wife decided at the last minute to share her testimony and a struggle she fought with abuse in her own life. As she spoke of the abusive home she was raised in and how it began to effect her own parenting I couldn't help but cry. I so desperately needed to hear someone being honest about how hard being a parent can be and the battles we just don't see coming. Her transparency showed me it was time for me to start being more open and honest about my own struggles.<br /></span></span><br /><span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#660000;"><span style="font-family:verdana;">Throughout the time I have had three children, I have struggled with postpartum depression. After each of my children were born I faced 18 months of some of the darkest days of my life. The depression, frustration, anger, impatience and emotions I just couldn't control began to take over my home. It was really confusing the first two times I went through it and brought a lot of guilt and shame and fear into my heart. Who was this awful person I had become? But then when I was pregnant with my last child the emotional roller coaster was so obvious that I finally realized it was hormones and not just me.<br /></span></span><br /><span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#660000;"><span style="font-family:verdana;">Hearing the testimony at the marriage seminar about abuse also opened my eyes to the cancer abuse is in a persons life. Being raised in an abusive home isn't something you choose. You don't get to pick your parents or divorce or alcoholism or abuse. Those things are given to you by others and you have no control over them. The wonderful baton of abuse is passed to you w/o any choice of your own. Seeing that helped me to look more objectively at my anger and impatience and battle with my own words and thoughts.<br /></span></span><br /><span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#660000;"><span style="font-family:verdana;">I have come a long way in the last few years of parenting. I am learning to lay my anger down. To take deep breaths and walk away more often. To close my eyes and tell myself that I love my daughter and she doesn't deserve the words on the tip of my tongue and then to swallow them. And I am also learning to humble myself and apologize to my children when I do mess up and lose my temper with them. I want them to know that it isn't ok and that I am so very sorry when I fail them.<br /></span></span><br /><span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#660000;"><span style="font-family:verdana;">None of this has been easy, and none of it has been in my own strength. I have spent countless hours crying out to God to set me free. To help me fight this cancer of abuse that was passed on to me. To help me stand up against it and say "no more". My children are worth the battle I have to fight. The most amazing thing has happened in the midst of my battle with abuse and depression that I have faced. I have been given a knowledge of the depth of Love God has toward me.<br /></span></span><br /><span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#660000;"><span style="font-family:verdana;">On my darkest days God has shined a love into my heart that has blown me away. There was one weekend in particular when my depression got really bad, I was so overwhelmed and oppressed. My heart just kept crying out to God "how much longer?" I was so tired of the heaviness and the dark cloud that seemed to take over my heart. I was feeling so guilty for the impatience and anger was I dishing out to everyone. My poor husband has had to learn his own lessons in patience and compassion over the years! By the time Sunday rolled around I felt like giving up. Just digging a whole, climbing in and staying there forever.<br />We pulled up to church and all I kept thinking was "how in the world am I going to muster up a smile and friendly greeting for everyone today?" I guess I have done my own share of hiding behind the smiles in the last few years. Just once I would love to go up to someone and ask how they are doing and hear them say "you know what? I am having the worst day of my life, can you pray for me?" How refreshing would that be?<br /></span></span><br /><span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#660000;"><span style="font-family:verdana;">Our church always has a time of worship after the pastor preaches. It usually lasts 20-30 minutes and I find that that is when God speaks to my heart the most. On this particular day I shut my eyes and just started to sing my heart out. I wanted to give Jesus all the hurt, discouragement, anger, frustration and fear. The song "Amazed" by the Desperation Band started up.<br /><br />The words are:<br />You dance over me, when I am unaware<br />You sing all around, though I cannot hear a sound<br />Lord I'm amazed by you<br />Lord I'm amazed by you<br />How you love me.<br />How deep, how wide, how great, is your love for me. </span></span><br /><span style="font-family:lucida grande;color:#660000;"><span style="font-family:verdana;"><br />Such a simple song, but in that moment so very profound for me. Time stopped, I fell silent and just listened. I remembered a sermon I once heard about how God literally dances and sings over us (I think the verse is in Zeph). In that moment I was so overwhelmed by God's love for me. Here I was at my lowest point, I was disgusted with my own heart and failings, frustrated with my battle with postpartum depression, and feeling so very unloved and unworthy. In that moment I knew in my heart of hearts that Jesus loved me with an undying love, an everylasting love, a love with no beginning and no end. A love I couldn't earn and didn't deserve. And yet, a love that consumed me.<br /><br />I have always known that you can't earn God's love. But it has been in the last year or so that I have found God truly revealing to me that he loves me <em>despite</em> me. I don't just know it now, I have been consumed by it. It has become a firm foundation on which I am now standing. The most amazing thing for me, is that I have only just begun to see His love. Like a tiny drop in an ocean. His love is too vast to fully understand until I stand face to face with Jesus and can know it for eternity.<br /><br />I wanted to be honest about my struggles. That I am anything but the "perfect mom", but I serve a perfect God who loves me with an everlasting love.I hope someone is encouraged by my honesty today. Isn't it time we stop being afraid of what people will think of our weaknesses and just be honest with each other about how frail we all are? I hope you will take the chance to encourage someone with your own story today.<br /><br />I would love it if you took a minute to post a comment about your struggles or how you have learned of God's love in a deeper way. Maybe you need prayer today and just want to know you aren't alone. If you don't hear it from anyone else today, know that you aren't alone. Jesus loves you with an all consuming love. God can be your strength and help in your time of need.<br />God bless you today!</span><span style="font-family:verdana;"> </span><br /></span><span style="font-family:Verdana;">Oh and you can listen to the song Amazed by clicking the link above. Take a minute to listen to it and realize the love God has for you today!</span></span><br /></span>Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13783268352243429079noreply@blogger.com1